Abusive Boss-zillias

Seven Rules to Surviving An Abusive Boss
By Elvira G. Aletta, Ph.D.
December 22, 2008

At the interview for my first professional job, my future boss asked me, “I notice you’re married. Are you planning to get pregnant?” After I picked my jaw off the floor I stammered, “Uh, no?”

It was a totally illegal question and the shocker was it came from a woman. What I should have done was run screaming for the nearest exit. But the job was offered, I took it and three years later I quit with a raging case of Post-Traumatic Boss Disorder.

Rule #1: How you are treated from ‘go’ is a good indicator of how you will be treated on the job. The first phone call, your interview, how an offer is made and how negotiations are handled…

My boss made me think I was her confidant. She gave me the plum jobs and ‘confided’ to me that everyone else was inferior. For two years my feet hardly touched the ground.

It didn’t last. The Boss-zilla is a soul-sucking manipulator of narcissistic proportions. He hooks you with compliments and seductive ‘let’s be friends’ invitations. First you are the golden child, held above all others and then he tears out your heart and show it to you while it’s still pumping..… uh… Did I say that out loud?

Rule #2: Keep a healthy distance. You cannot be friends with your boss.

Into the third year, my work was bounced back to me bleeding red edits. My boss started calling me into her office for ‘feedback’ sessions that got more and more humiliating. How did I lose my touch? Answer: I didn’t. I was the same hard-working nerd I always was; it was my boss’s attitude toward me that had changed.

Rule #3: You are neither all good nor all bad.

My co-workers hated me. As long as I was the ‘good’ one I didn’t care. When things went south I couldn’t take being isolated anymore and I started talking with other staff. Generously they forgave me and shared their own horror stories of abuse from my boss. What an eye opener!

Rule #4: Keep open diplomacy among co-workers.

They don’t have to be your friends but you should be able to compare notes just like siblings do about their parents. Dysfunctional bosses often use the old divide and conquer game to keep staff malleable.

Once I realized it wasn’t me, that it was a sick, dysfunctional corporate culture that allowed my boss to be abusive, I had a decision to make. My moment of truth came when I realized I had become someone I didn’t recognize and didn’t like. Depressed, obsequious, timid, who was this person? I wanted my spirit back and the only way for me was to leave. So I quit. That sounds easy. It wasn’t. It took months to find a job that felt like a good move, not a big step backwards.

Rule #5: Learn to define yourself by who are, not what you do.

Or “Don’t forget to have a life.” A lot of us were raised to think our end-all and be-all is our occupation. The first thing we tend to ask each other after being introduced is, “So what do you do?” I’ve had clients, grown men miserable in their jobs, shrink from the idea of quitting primarily because they have no idea who they are without the job. Family and friends (my husband was great at this) help us remember we are parents, church and temple members, coaches, thinkers, readers, spouses, travelers, life adventurers and more. These roles are constant no matter what the job is.

Rule #6: Always remember you have options; quitting is only one of them.

If you think you don’t, you will become depressed, a burnt-out shadow of your former self. Find a psychologist, life coach or career counselor to help you regain the perspective you’ve lost in abusive boss hell.

I don’t know anyone who doesn’t have at least one Boss-zilla story. A power-mad night supervisor at Taco Bell or a VP at a Fortune 500 company, it’s all the same. Post-traumatic Boss Disorder (PTBD) is no joke. It took me a good year to stop shaking every time my new boss asked me to his office for a conference.

Rule #7: Living well is the best revenge.

Giving notice to Boss-zilla was as bad as I thought it was going to be. She called me ungrateful; I was told my poor performance would follow me wherever I went. What kept me calm throughout her tantrum was knowing my new job was at a very prestigious institution, which had to be killing her. She didn’t need to know there was no salary increase.

PTBD struck again many years later. Older and wiser, I recognized the signs early and took action quicker than before. From then on I’ve been self-employed. Today I’m happy to say my boss is usually pretty reasonable.

TRACK DAZ October 31!!

31 October 2009 @ Streets of Willow Springs

A tight, technical workout for anyone wanting to improve their handling skills.


A Group - 31 October 2009 @ Streets of Willow Springs
A group is for experienced track riders, and licensed racers. The pace is very fast!
24 places available


B Group - 31 October 2009 @ Streets of Willow Springs
Group for experienced track riders. This group has riders who have many track days under their belts, who understand the rules and are comfortable at riding at a very quick pace.
Sold out! Add me to the wait list


C Group - 31 October 2009 @ Streets of Willow Springs
Group for experienced street-oriented riders who have only a small amount of track experience (or no previous track experience). Pace in this group is moderately fast
Sold out! Add me to the wait list

Riding ODe

fingers twitch
spines tingle
Hands grip
Feet press
Eyes water
knees flex
stomachs churn
hearts beat
ears listen
noses wrinkle






and she rides away


Mark Drake

Boss Stress

Been a very buzy summer. Lot of stress as the major accounts have been making us sweat the little details. THe Boss just passes the work load down on his slaves by directives and missing information.

Several times this summer TheBoss has moved up due dates of projects and I am on point to met the new goals. Been cutting corners to get the work done and today an example of his rush to market met with the lack of preperation due to lack of time and equipment.


The nite was spent working on a problem in the mind until I was able to get the solution at 3:00am. I got in at 6am and was able to make the engineering change to allow the next step of the proccess to continue. He just came in and rode us rather than help as usual.

Came close to walking out his attitude.

2nd and 14th admendment are tied better now

The 9th Circuit Court of Appeals just issued it ruling in Nordyke vs. King and has "incorporated" the 2nd Amendment against the states and local governments via the Due Process clause of the 14th Amendment! The times, they are a-changin'!

All the rights enumerated in The Bill of Rights protect us only from the federal government. The states and local governments were perfectly free to violate them all they wanted. So we passed the 14th amendment to incorporate these protections against all levels of government. After all, it's kind of silly to say that you have the right to do X, but if you do X, you're going to be arrested by state/county/city law enforcement officers. Now the authors of the 14th amendment understood the danger of enumerating rights, so they didn't enumerate exactly which rights were being applied to the state and local governments (though they made it quite clear that they included those rights listed in The Bill of Rights). To make a long story short, before you can really claim that you have a right, a federal court must rule that this particular right is "incorporated" in the 14th amendment. The 9th Federal Circuit Court of Appeals just done so for the 2nd amendment. The recent Heller decision established that the 2nd amendment referred to an individual right, Nordyke says that the states and local governments may not violate our individual 2nd amendment rights.

As for practical effects, nothing immediate. Now, if you have the time, money, and inclination, you can legitimately claim that certain gun control laws are unconstitutional, and you won't be dismissed out of hand. We still don't have any good case law fleshing out exactly what is and is not protected by the 2nd amendment. There is still a lot of painful and expensive work to be done. But, this was a major victory and fundamental to everything to come. Now will come a storm of cases challenging every single gun control law, executive regulation, import restriction, etc.

Living on the edge

Several times you have the opportunity to creep up the the wind swept edge of life to teeter on the ragged edge of a decision.

College, dating, the first kiss, interviews, and other ones that take time to reach and have lasting consequences.

Some times the edge jumps up so fast you your reaction determine the result.

Sports, driving, accidents, and other instant actions determine a positive of negative result.

Your future is determined by both factors and the strength of those decision are made by the amount of space that you allow yourself to balance on that edge of life.

The question I ask myself and you should evaluate is the width of the edge you live on.

--lowell--

Tea anyone

So I am sitting in a Hotel in Calexico, CA and the April 15th Tea parties will be running tomorrow.

I really hope that the combined might of Americans standing up and saying "ENOUGH" will make a difference. This Tax and spend environment has to stop or the time of my non-retirement will be wearing a paper hat till I die.

The best country in this world is quickly being polarized by the macro directions of the parties.

Neither party wants to solve problems but would rather play any pollster game that allows them to stay in the government seat they occupy.

It is hard to believe that people will be content to suck at the saggy nipples to the government welfare trough. Have we so lost the ambition to work, achieve, and better our position?

The future looks bleak and the social fabric of the world will be torn asunder in a global maelstrom of human disorder.


--lowell--

Why Socialism and it's style of government fails.

An economics professor at Texas Tech said he had never failed a single
student before-- but had once, failed an entire class. The class had
insisted that Socialism worked and that no one would be poor and no one
would be rich, a great equalizer. The professor then said OK, we will have
an experiment in this class on Socialism.

All grades would be averaged and everyone would receive the same grade--
no one would fail, and no one would receive an A.

After the first test the grades were averaged and everyone got a B. The students
who studied hard were upset... and the students who studied little were happy. But,
as the second test rolled around, the students who studied little had studied even
less and the ones who studied hard decided they wanted a free ride so they studied
very little. The second test average was a D. Nobody was happy. When the 3rd test

was given, the average was an F.

The scores never increased... while bickering, blame and name calling resulted in hard

feelings; shortly no studying was being done. All failed, to their great surprise, and

the professor told them that Socialism would ultimately always fail, because the harder
it is to succeed, the greater the reward; but when government takes the reward away,

no one tries and neither the individual nor the group succeeds.
________

The problem with Socialism is that you eventually run out of other people's money.

--Margaret Thatcher

Masters Week

The first golf Major of 2009 and all the top players will be there.



The weather looks to play a factor this year as it is WAY cold in the deep south for this time of year.

I have two choices for the winner this year.

Easy choice is TIGER of course and my dark horse pick is ...

Ogilvy, Geoff

Australia

AZ

Can't wait to watch it thisw weekend on the DVR as I will be out golfing saturday and sunday.

Sierra Rally, A fun time with friends

We’re here to provide you with information on how to participate in this ‘gathering of friends’ in California’s beautiful Southern Sierra Mountains
Memorial Day weekend May 22 – 25, 2009.

On the left you’ll find links that’ll give you information on how to register, show you maps of the area with suggested routes, and tell you a bit more about the rally itself.

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Across the bottom of this page are a number of links to helpful websites including Sierra Rally’s
Bulletin Board
It’s a place where you can post your rally ride plans, share your stories and connect with other rally participants.

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Be sure and bring your best/worse/cheesiest cowboy shirt/hat/belt buckle for Saturday night's Western BBQ dinner. Prizes will be awarded for the best rompin' stompin' cowboy and cowgirl attire…

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And, back by popular acclaim, Friday's LBD Night. This was so much fun last year we've decided to do it again this year. All the ladies are invited to wear their favorite Little Black Dress to dinner Friday night.

Note: Any guy wearing a LBD will be immediately tossed in the pool!

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If you have any questions or suggestions, please contact us at:
sierrarally@hotmail.com

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Come browse our website often.

Thank you for your patience. We hope to be able to post more content soon - once we figure out how all this new web softwear works!

We welcome your comments, contributions and insights.
Remember, it’s YOU that makes this rally such a special event!

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If you wish to recommend this rally to a friend, please feel free to do so. However, in keeping with the spirit of this event – a gathering of friends – we ask that you please resist the temptation to post this information to any open list or website.

Teabags for government

Thomas Payne is and was a radical for the people.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jeYscnFpEyA&feature=related

Is a good Red and Blue statement to drive the point home that Government is going in the wrong direction.

Please look at your personal situation and see if your are protecting tour freedoms and rights under our laws.

It is time to either act and let people and elected lawmakers know your discontent or as Payne advocated, "Buy a Gun"

Future think and government intervention to our life.

New taxes to affect your lifestyle:

If your BMI too high, tax you till your weight in with-in the govt standards (and then standards change).

If you do not meet the govt guide-lines for physical conditioning, boot camp till you do, of course at your expense.

You will be required to have blood and urine tests every week to check for addictions like sugar and caffeine and taken away to treatment camps until your cured. (at your expense).

If you drive more than the govt allowed mileage per/period your classified as a gross polluter and double taxed and given a bicycle till you work off your carbon tax.

If you enjoy life with pleasures like drink, food, and kids. Your taxed on the Wellness table to reduce the enjoyment of life.

If you live too long then your family is taxed for the age induced life expectancy waste amendment.


-brought to you by your friendly caring socialist government.



Don't think it can happen?
We did not pay personal income taxes till the 1930's

Guns on Campus: Bills would allow concealed weapons on Texas college campuses

AUSTIN, Texas (AP) —A public hearing is set for Monday in the House Public Safety Committee on one bill, sponsored by Rep. Joe Driver, a Garland Republican.

Supporters say the bills would protect the rights of those licensed to carry concealed weapons and help prevent a massacre on the scale of what happened at Virginia Tech and another shooting last year at Northern Illinois University, where five were killed and 18 wounded.

Texas issued 73,090 licenses in fiscal year 2008. The state requires applicants to pass a training course, pass a criminal background check and be at least 21 years old. Texas campuses are gun-free zones.

"These are individuals who are already licensed and allowed to carry weapons. What marks the imaginary line of college campuses?" said Katie Kasprzak, a recent Texas State University graduate and spokeswoman for Students for Concealed Carry on Campus, a group that claims more than 37,000 members.

If gunfire erupted on campus, "Would you rather sit and just take shot for shot or would you rather have a chance to fight back?" asked Kasprzak, who has a concealed weapons license.

State Sen. Jeff Wentworth, R-San Antonio, sponsor of the Senate bill, said students, faculty and staff are "sitting ducks" if someone starts blasting.

"I have no desire to wake up one morning and read in the newspaper, or hear on the radio, or watch on television a news report that 32 Texas college students were gunned down like sitting ducks by some deranged gunman," Wentworth said.

Opponents say that if guns are allowed on campus, students and faculty will live in fear of classmates and colleagues, not knowing who might pull a gun over a drunken dorm argument or a poor grade.

According to the Brady Campaign Against Gun Violence, similar bills have been filed in 18 states since 2008 and all have failed, although lawmakers in a few states are trying again.

Texas is one of seven states currently considering legislation.

"We hope Texas will serve as a leader and have a domino effect," Kasprzak said.

Of the 150 House members, 70 have signed on in support of Drivers' bill. In the Senate, 12 of 31 senators signed in support of Wentworth's bill.

The idea has met stiff opposition at the University of Texas, which has its own history of shooting violence. Charles Whitman's 1966 rifle attack from the top of the university tower killed 16 people and wounded dozens more. It was the worst campus shooting until the Virginia Tech bloodbath.

Solar Power on every roof toop in the us..

Solar Panels and Solar Power Kits

Did you know that the very sunlight which provides energy to growing plants can easily supply enough electricity to meet all human needs? Battery chargers, water pumps, and home electricity are just a few examples of what can be powered by photovoltaic technology. Even more options are available through solar thermal design.

Solar panel manufacturing technology
In crystalline silicon solar cells, the orderly arrangement of atoms results in the efficient conversion of sunlight to electricity. A typical crystalline silicon solar panel consists of a transparent glass surface, an ethyl vinyl acetate (EVA) encapsulant, a Tedlar rear layer and an aluminum outer frame.

Because it uses less semiconductor material thin-film deposition is easier and less expensive than crystalline silicon-ingot growth techniques because it uses less semiconductor material. The three principal thin-film technologies are amorphous silicon (a-Si), cadmium telluride (CdTe) and copper indium gallium diselenide (CIGS). These processes produce high-efficiency modules that can be built directly into roofing shingles for aesthetic architectural considerations.

Effective string-ribbon manufacturing combines conventional crystalline silicon and emerging thin film technology. The high-temperature, molten process contributes to a double yield over conventional solar panel construction per pound of silicon for high material efficiency.

Photovoltaic (PV) systems
In addition to solar panels, a photovoltaic (PV) system requires a mounting structure to tilt panels toward the sun, an inverter to convert panel-generated direct current (DC) into appliance-friendly alternating current (AC), battery storage to compensate for unfavorable weather conditions, and a charge controller to regulate battery operation.

Grid-tie systems are interconnected to the utility network. Wired with a synchronizing inverter, grid-tie systems feed surplus electricity back into the local utility. The utility acts as an infinite storage system, eliminating the need for batteries. Grid-tie systems are aligned with many government-sponsored incentives.

Off-grid systems are stand-alone systems designed for RV, cabin, remote, backup and portable power applications. Because they do not rely on the electrical grid, off-grid systems require batteries to offset lesser power production due to prolonged periods of inclement weather.

OFF the Grid

Hi all,


I feel the need to start a place to express my views and news to direct my thoughts. The last six months have been filled with a clamor that I am unsure of the end result.

In my heart, I feel that this current trend of political social engineering is leading this country down a path that will be difficult to recover from. I feel that the people are not seeing that our freedoms are being taken from us. Once taken we will have to fight twice as hard to have them again.

The values of personal responsibility, financial security, and independence is lost by many that are only looking for "big brother" to provide for them in life.

If you don't agree with my views at least be courteous in responding to them.

All for now.